🏆sillympics
Enter two atproto handles. They're entered into five ridiculous events — virtual pizza eating, digital badge collecting, a reply-chain relay, a profile polish pageant, and a doomscroll marathon — each scored off a real public profile stat plus a little seeded luck. Whoever wins the most events takes gold. Same two handles always run the same games — it's a tournament, not a coin flip.
how does this work?
Each handle's public profile (app.bsky.actor.getProfile)
feeds five events:
- 🍕 pizza eating — post count
- 🎖️ badge collecting — accounts followed
- 🏃 reply-chain relay — follower/follows ratio
- 💅 profile pageant — bio length, display name, avatar
- 🛋️ doomscroll marathon — follower count
Each event adds one seeded jitter roll on top of the real stat, so a bigger number is favored but never guaranteed. Whoever wins three or more of the five events is champion. The whole tournament is seeded off a hash of both DIDs together (plus each event's own name), so a rematch between the same two handles always plays out exactly the same way — same scores, same champion, every time.